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2. (wet blanket lullabies)

by Spirit of the Void

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credits

released April 15, 2016

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Spirit of the Void Apple Valley, Minnesota

The Spirit of the Void is a 7 album creation story.

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Track Name: not
I am not a smoker I'm just stuck in my addiction
I am not a pervert I'm just hard wired hardly living
Before you cast me down down low I'd hope that you'd consider
I am just like you my friend we're all stuck down here together

I am not a saint I'm only stuck in my own legend
I am not a savior I'm just trying to find my heaven
Before you loft me up on high I'd hope that you'd consider
You are just like me my friend let's all find freedom together
Track Name: pass the past
I swear I think I've had enough
I'm sick of all the things that I used to be and still am
But I'm tired of doggin all the crowds
So I'm stickin all my demons in a turkey baster and I'm squeezin em out
Cause I'd rather jump around and shout
I cried cause I had no shoes and I still don't but I found my face
Finally, once again I'm not afraid
It's good to see you my old friend

Don't look back
that wont last
it's time to pass the past

Don't tense up
Don't begrudge
This step is where you're at

But the shadow of my ghost it haunts my steps
It's everywhere I've been and it's everywhere I'm about to be
Maybe who I was really can't be beat
But the past has passed like a kidney stone and I'm not the man I used to be
It's not that I've become lazy
Maybe I know healthy soldiers go up to the front lines and I wanna go home
but I never really was alone
It's good to be with you my old friend

And I've been searching for that mighty wind
But I've only found in the memories of who I've been
I've spent my time retracing steps
It's looked me in the eye, it's stronger than me and my best friends
It's the memory of who I've been
Track Name: Moving 4wards
I've been spending too much time
askin why theres water rollin down your eyes
back me up and talk your heart
don't call my name and lock me out

this is not my load to bear
you have made it obvious with your deadpan stare
you've got things you aught to share
my turn to shrug, it's not my chair

I won't waste my mistakes and thoughts
you left me behind at a drop
I'm not the bottom or the top
I'm like an ivy in a box
not down so why would I get up?

That's why they call it moving forwards
that's why they call it moving forwards

Have you studied Newtons law
objects at rest never tend to get along
I could use a nudge or fall
let me slip, I'll find my walk

I won't waste my mistakes and thoughts
you left me behind at a drop
I've finally fallen from the top
now I can give it all I got
and I'm never giving up

That's why they call it moving forwards
Track Name: carry on til i'm strong
Oh carry on, shoulda saw it was going wrong all along
I check my songs, I check my thoughts, it seems obvious
time catch up, time fill my cup, cause i'm waiting on 20/20 hindsight
I'm misjudged and I can't talk words turn around, oh how predictable am I
can't escape all the things in all their heads that they think I am
now I'm dead and in my stead those intentions that they say I have
but they're wrong, but there's no one to prove since I'm gone so

You think you know all about the things that make me scream and shout
dontcha
I've held my peace and i've carried on forgiven all you've said and done
for too long

you've locked me up in all your thoughts I can't get out but I wont make you doubt.. like you

Oh carry on, til i'm gone and we're drifting apart
oh now my thoughts made a spark and set fire to my grave
not deep enough i'm waiting on all the time to catch up
time was never mine it just keeps me stuck in this line
Track Name: yeah okay yeah
is it okay to be confused
is it okay to be down and blue
is it okay to rather be rescued
i think i want to wait and see what He'll do
Track Name: we are not allies
We are not allies cigarettes
We are not allies drunkenness
We are not allies clenched fists
We are not allies red puckered lips

I just need someone to free me from
my own desires

We are not allies cigarettes
fuck you too my drunkenness
I don't need you clenched fists
we are not allies red puckered lips

I told you once I'll tell you again
but it don't mean one thing
Track Name: ruts
You might say I'm stuck inside a rut
It's true everything I've loved now tastes like dust
and every tool to understand as turned rust
..what can I trust?

but I know that I know, that I know that I know we've just begun

I recall a time when I'd want nothing else
to be with you was my only thought
Now the only thing I'm crying out

is what have I done?
and what can I do?
..I'm such a fool

Cause I'm so I am so, I am so, I am so, I am so made low
I can just wait on the only one, just maybe in a more omisive way

take me away
come replace
just go away
Track Name: 10x
Here's to me making this life not worth living
caught up in what i thought was possible
and the fire that was once inside my veins
to do whats right has dried, how pathetic

don't you e'er get tired of waiting on
grace's holy empowerment
I'm supposed to be ten times the man I am
I've had faith so long it's traumatic

so here's to me keeping everything incomplete
like a fish that's hooked.. just like everybody else
I'm supposed to be ten times the man I am
I've had faith so long it's traumatic
Track Name: I fear no man
Keep me in your face
just don't remove your grace
I fear no man
'sept the Godman
So don't remove your face
cause I fear no man
'sept the Godman
don't remove your face
I fear no man
don't remove your face
sept the Godman
don't remove your face
Track Name: Riverwalkin
It's twenty four and I'm getting sore
thought I'd of made a name by now
tired of burning candles at every end
now i'm content to watch them all burn out

it's twenty four and I'm getting worse
I'll never be in love like that
cause the only love that's endured at all
is my love with my own loneliness

yeah I could give it all I got
try becoming something I'm not
but the truth is over my head
'sides like a vapor i'll soon be dead
so why try again?..
Track Name: promises
I can keep all of my promises to everyone but me
I hardly have to ask why my grief is on fire but I never do
You think I'm a pretty goodish guy but you don't know who I am, or what I left behind
and neither do I

I activate when trouble comes don't leave me alone too long, I'll have drank too much and died
I have done a pretty good job hiding all the pretty little things deep inside, yeah I'm hiding down there too
It's true, I don't believe in giving up for everyone but me
I don't believe I'm still alive, i've sufficated some time ago, I really think it's true, I think I'm nothing to loose
not like you
Track Name: Isaiah 30 1 2 3
Rolled into Egypt yesterday
tried to find some relaxation
let down this splintery cross
try to find the strength to hoist it back up

but I think about you all the time
I think about you all the time
as if you're not right by my side
as if you're not right by my side

We chased that dragon through the rain
every prince we pushed away
angles formally salute and say,
"He thinks about you everyday."

And I think about you all the time
I think about you all the time!
As if you're not right by my side

But I cant help but correlate
the battle marching drums and your name
I just need a moment for me
away from all this shit but, believe me
Track Name: lighthouse
Like a warm winter blanket
your love has limitations
so soft and sweet
the love I'm having trouble keeping

why can't you stand by your man?
why cant you stand your man?

I know I'm stumbling
I see the vultures eyeing
I hear you beconning
but I feel the temperature dropping

Why can't you stand by your man?
why cant you stand your man?
Track Name: She wants to move to the Pacific NW
She wants to move to the northwest, like Portland or Seattle
She wants to move to the northwest, like Portland or Seattle
She'll try her hand and take a hand
break amends, escape her friends
She wants to move to the northwest, like Portland or Seattle

She wants to move to the northwest, like Portland or Seattle
She wants to move to the northwest, like Portland or Seattle
She don't see it as betraying friends
It's her golden key, so take the chance
She wants to move to the northwest, like Portland or Seattle

It's a hip hip place full of bicycle race
only the raddest survive in that high societal place
they got vegans and whit with zero eco footprint
so pack your one suitcase and join the rat race

She wants to move to the northwest, like Portland or Seattle
She wants to move to the northwest, like Portland or Seattle
she wants to feel the rain on her perfect legs
no more wollowing she'll take the reigns
She wants to move to the northwest, like Portland or Seattle
Track Name: deadbeat
I want to be the one,
no strength no faith two talents gained from one
yeah I'd be down with that,
if I was weak you promised you'd be near at hand
but I've got faith that's grown,
twice the size of a mile stone.. which makes me nervous
tell me what's it worth
to feel your feelings at full strength -well maybe I'm stronger now, ya i feel kinda stronger now

Still I think I'd be better off without a single thought
of efficiencies and reasoning what you want (and what I'm not)
I've saught for years and came up empty and alone, yah I was wrong
Now just let me be a deadbeat with a simple song

Yeah you're by my side, at my heels, inside, and also everywhere
yeah I've got faith to shake this world but still I think i'd be better off with you
look i'm off my feet, here we go again i've dropped my mind which is circling again

chorus

let me be your deadbeat
lord, let me be your deadbeat son
cause i don't want you expecting
somebody who just isn't me

still you call me over hills, in shadows, and sometimes in the sun
to prisoners, widows, nursing homes, and to orphans
I will go as long as I can spend my every second guess
clinging to your love in my distress
Track Name: Gentlest of wakes
I've made broken promises
Heard your call but didn't face it
I've refused to share my crosses
indulged in the immodest
lord it's no wonder

You start me off with ten talents
Sure, I'll spend five years fighting dragons
I'm aware of my losses
my ignorance and follies
I should know better

but my sins have proved
how great your love
things I thought I'd say
drift away

speaking is hard
words become sparse
holding your hand
while im lost in the dark

nothing has changed
it's the gentlest of wakes
you dont ask where i've been
when i look in your face

a smile overcomes
my mask that was worn
my God my God my
old friend is back in my heart

what has become?
not the mildest of change
I am who I was
but now your breaths in my veins
Track Name: honest love
honest love is what I want